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How to Keep the Love Alive in A Tamil Or Telugu Marriage?

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Tamil & Telugu Marriage

Marriages are different in the southern region of India as compared to North India, be it love marriage or arranged. Tamil and Telugu people constitute the significant population of South India, and they are known for their simple living and high caliber of education. If you want to see marriages full of Indian customs and traditions, then attending Telugu & Tamil weddings are a must. Marriage is the most critical spiritual symbol of the Tamil community. It is characterized by fun moments with family, attendance of distant relatives and lots of traditional food.

But there is a lot in life after Kalyanam or marriage. And an essential part of marriage is managing your relationship goals. With the increase in inter-caste marriages in India and even in Tamil and Telugu families, many marriages fail after a few years of marriage due to lack of love, too many fights, and cultural differences. Marriage is just the beginning of a new life, and there is a lot further. Marriage without love is like a flower without fragrance. But in most marriages, love seems to disappear after a few years.

No one wants to have a nasty married life filled with arguments and tension. But after marriage, the proportion of love continues to decrease and of arguments continue to increase in most cases. Let us consider some aspects that will help you keep your love alive in a Telugu or Tamil marriage!

Acceptance: Acceptance is the base of respect, and if you respect each other and your cultural and family differences, then you can go a long way ahead. Accepting each other should not be based on mere words, and it should show up in your actions too. As joint families characterize Tamil or Telugu culture, you should be ready to accept and respect each other’s families and relatives also. Clear communication and realistic expectations are an essential part of accepting each other.

Develop Friendship: In the South Indian culture, mostly the bride and the groom are both educated and at times, working individuals. They might be in the same profession too. It is crucial to develop an attitude of friendship amongst couples to gain confidence in each other. Just like you share your secrets and good times with your besties, if you do it with your soulmate, then you will have a lot of trust and understanding in your married life. Friends do understand each others’ perspectives and stand beside each other in difficult times, and if you share your day with your partner, you will have the same trust in your relationship too.

Compatibility: Tamil matrimony or Telugu matrimony involves a lot of compatibility tests before the family finalizes marriage. You must take the time to understand each others’ values, interests, and goals. This will make you more comfortable with each other.

Do Not Stop Dating: Most couples end spending time with each other after marriage and get involved in their routine life. This is the biggest mistake they can make. It is quite common in South Indian families because, in big families, responsibilities are many. Even holidays and dinners are generally with the entire family. This kills the spark between the couple to some extent. So, take out some time and steal some privacy. Try to impress each other, have fun, love deeply and laugh with each other. You can even date your beau at home. So, bring the romance back into your life.

Share Your Responsibilities: As both husband and wife are working in many modern South Indian families, it becomes difficult to handle personal as well as professional lives effectively. This leads to arguments and fights that can eventually bring an end to your married life. Do not overburden your partner with familial responsibilities. Share the work at home and enjoy spending time with each other while doing the daily chores of the house. Even responsibilities of the kids can be shared. This can be an excellent way to build your relationship stronger.

Give Some Space: Married couples stay together, but that does not mean that they should invade the personal space of each other. After marriage, your partner need not be with you at all times, emotionally and physically. Give enough personal space and freedom to each other so that your love can blossom effectively.

Forgive and Be Forgiven: Arguments and fights are a common thing in every marriage, especially in the initial years till you get used to each other. But if you want to keep the fire of love alive in your hearts, then you must learn to forgive each other. It is not necessary that you would always be right. Also, winning an argument is not going to get you any reward. Holding grudges over small arguments and petty matters can kill your relationship.

Listen: The art of listening is entirely different from hearing, but few people understand it. Understand the verbal and non-verbal meanings of your spouse’s words. Take the time to understand his/her life and health conditions and expectations. If you want a vibrant marriage, then you should listen more than you speak.

Have A Daily Dose of Love: Love and kindness is not meant for birthdays and anniversaries alone. You can celebrate every moment of togetherness and love between you. Do not leave your kindness and affection for special occasions. Giving small gifts to each other, even chocolate or a rose can bring a smile on your partner’s face. The more you love your partner, the more you will receive. So, light up your passion and have a dose of love daily.

Follow these simple tips and make them your way of life. As many Tamil matrimonial sites and Telugu matrimonial sites also advise, if you follow these tips, love will never fade away in your married life. Tamil and Telugu people are born romantic by nature, but if your marriage is in a bad phase due to some misunderstanding, then it is time to hold each other’s hands and say words like “Sorry,” and “I Love you.”

What Makes Telugu Weddings Stand Out!

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Telugu Wedding

In India, every region has different types of traditional wedding rituals. Since both are from the South, Telugu weddings are pretty similar to the Tamil wedding ceremonies. However, some unique nuances make a traditional Telugu wedding stand out!

Focus on Spirituality

While many Indian traditional weddings incorporate religious customs, the traditional Telugu wedding focuses more on spirituality and subtle symbolism. What stands out the most in Telugu weddings is the nuance of foregrounding spirituality more than mere religion.

Respect for Women

Traditionally, any Telugu wedding is deemed complete only if the women participate in the proceedings. Telugu traditions pay utmost respect to women and consider them equal to men with regard to wedding and family life.

Dazzling Décor

Typically, a Telugu wedding will have eye-dazzling jazzy décor with quite a lot of predictable themes such as a ceremonial backdrop of Tirupati Balaji and Shree. Usually, the wedding canopy is extravagantly decked in ‘gold’ and rich, pompous décor. Nischitartham, the Telugu version of a ring ceremony is another pompous affair. The grandeur of the Nischitartham ceremony is usually unparalleled in its aesthetic.

Unique Pre-Wedding Traditions

A day before the wedding, the bride and the groom have their Mangal snaanam, which is a sacred bath to mark the passing away of their single lifestyle and progression into married life. The women of the family bathe the bride and then offer Aarti to the deities. The bride worships Lord Ganesh and Goddess Gauri at her house. She prays to Gauri Mata to seek blessings for her conjugal bliss. The groom, on the other hand, is made to wear the sacred thread and readied for the wedding in his own house. The groom also performs a Ganesh puja to ward off any bad luck or evil.

The Bride in A Basket

Another unique feature of a traditional Telugu Matrimony is the bizarre custom related to the entry of the bride to the wedding hall. A Telugu Bride, in some sub-sects and communities of the Telugu people, is brought to the Mandapam in a wicker basket by her maternal uncle! It is indeed a sight to behold! A Telugu Bride, dressed gorgeously and looking ethereal, is seated in a big wicker basket and is carried into the wedding canopy by her family! The groom is seated at the altar while the bride, richly decked, arrives in a bamboo basket, carried by her maternal uncles. The scene can be relished as an old customary fun exercise. But some modern thinking Telugu brides have begun questioning this particular ritual as a patriarchal and sexist objectification of women, depicting the girl to be some material object being brought in as a basketful of a material offering to the groom. But this debate aside, such a strange spectacle does make a traditional Telugu wedding stand out!

Sticky Blessings

Another tricky, rather sticky unique feature of the Telugu ceremony is the ritual of Jeerakalla-Bellamu. Once the bride is at the Mandapam, a curtain is placed between her and the groom. Then, the priest begins to chant the sacred wedding mantras. It is then, at that auspicious muhuratam, the bride and the groom, facing each other, but unable to see each other due to the curtain, are each handed a leaf with the stickiest blend of cumin seeds and sweet jaggery. The couple then places this sticky concoction on each other’s heads while the curtain is removed from between them. This bizarre ritual, an intrinsic part of every traditional Telugu wedding, symbolizes the unbreakable eternal bonding of the couple, just as the sticky and hard to separate mix of jaggery and cumin. The symbolism really stands out, even days after the actual ceremony as this strangest symbol of unbreakable bond simply won’t wash out of the couple’s hair for the next few days.

The Colors of Madhuparkam

In this beautiful ritual, the traditional Telugu bride is made to wear a red-bordered cotton saree and the groom, a red-bordered white cotton dhoti. The color combination symbolizes purity, strength, and passion and this is the authentic traditional Telugu wedding attire for the bride and the groom. Thereafter, the groom ties a mangalsutra around the bride’s neck and precisely ties it in three knots, symbolizing the couple’s tripartite, mental, physical and spiritual union.

More Stuff on The Head

In another unique ritual of Talambralu, both the bride and the groom are handed either handful of pearls or turmeric-mixed rice by the priest. The couple cups their hands, and as the pearls or rice is poured in, they hold it. Then, both simply pour it all over each other’s head as a priest keeps chanting the sacred mantras.

The Long-Drawn Wedding

Another uniqueness of the Telugu wedding ceremony is that it is a really long affair that usually takes up more than a couple of hours. This is all the more why in between such long-drawn ceremonies, the traditional Telugu wedding is interspersed with various fun games incorporated to keep the ceremony lively and the guests amused.

Fun Game of Dominance

Nearing the end of the ceremony, the Telugu groom is supposed to slide a pair of silver rings onto the toes of his bride. This is yet another symbol of the man claiming the woman as his wife. Another fun game is where the priest, at this juncture of the ceremony, puts the couple’s wedding rings inside a pot full of colored water and the couple is supposed to hunt these out. The custom requires that the couple put their hands into the pot simultaneously and whoever, between the two, find the rings first is believed to be the dominant one in that marriage.

In conclusion

Thus, a traditional Telugu wedding is a unique and strange blend of traditions and culture, religion and spirituality, respect for women and certain nuances seemingly patriarchal and definitely full of fun, frolic and lavish colors. All of this makes any traditional Telugu wedding stand out from most other wedding rituals of the region.

Top 4 Reasons Why Telugu Weddings Are Considered Quirky

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Matrimony in India is usually a grand event, and it feels like it comes straight out of a fantasy romance novel. Each region of India and each Indian community has different ceremonies, customs and wedding rituals that make it stand apart from the rest. However, when we talk about Telugu weddings, they are definitely a class apart where the “quirky” quotient is concerned. If you are looking forward to attending a Telugu wedding in the near future, brace yourself for a very long ceremony packed with rituals and rites. You are going to be witness to a whole lot of quirky practices but loads of sumptuous food as well.

Read on to discover some of those practices!

1) The arrival of the bride is in a basket.
Yes, you read it right! The groom is found seated at the altar when the bride arrives in a basket in all her glory that is carried by the bride’s uncles. It is almost as if the bride is being offered to the groom in a basket, which she is! That said, it makes for a fun and entertaining exercise as the bride is showed off on her way to the altar, wearing a flower braid and decked in gold.

2) Sticky blessings are given and received.
At the moment of the auspicious time or the muhurat, the groom and the bride sit opposite each other, facing each other. A curtain separates them to ensure that they cannot see each other. Then, just as the curtain is slowly removed from their midst, both the bride and the groom place a leaf on each other’s head that contains a mixture of cumin seeds and jaggery. This ritual signifies the eternal bonding and ties between two individuals, much like cumin and jaggery. This is an unbreakable bond for their matrimonial life to come.

3) The groom gets cold feet and decides to flee.
This ritual is known as the Kashi Yatra in which the groom pretends to renounce all the material gains of the world and go to Kashi to live the life of a celibate. This is when the bride’s brother mock pleads with the groom to reconsider his decision and marry his sister. The groom, after much persuasion, “agrees” to marry his bride and the wedding rituals continue.

4) The wedding games
It is no secret that Telugu weddings tend to go on for a very long time which is why there are several games incorporated into the days to keep everyone amused. One specific game which is also a ritual involves the groom and the bride showering each other with handfuls of rice kernels during the recitation of prayers by the priest.

These are some weird yet quirky rituals that take place in Telugu weddings. If you are also looking for a Telugu life partner for yourself, why not avail the services of telugu matrimonial sites? Matrimony sites have helped people aplenty to find their soulmates throughout the world. So, why not try it out for yourself?

Sacred Rituals of a Telugu Wedding

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Every region of India follows a unique set of traditions and customs that are very specific to that place. That said, Telugu matrimony is quite similar to Tamil Matrimony in a lot of ways. A unique tradition that is followed in Telugu wedding ceremonies is that they focus not just on religion but also on spirituality.

In Telugu weddings, the ceremonies are considered to be incomplete until women participate in them. They are given the highest consideration and utmost respect where women are considered in family life and marriages.

Let’s check out some sacred rituals of Telugu weddings that make them so utterly holy, dreamy and pure!

1) Muhurtham

In the ritual of Muhurtham, the auspicious date of the wedding is finalized by a priest with the elderly family members. It is pertinent to note that Telugu weddings usually do not happen during the months of Shunya, Asad, and Bhadrapad.

2) Pellikuthuru

This ritual is quite similar to the Haldi ceremony that is performed in the Northern states. In this matrimonial ceremony, a paste is made of turmeric and oil which is applied to the body of both the bride and the groom. Thereafter, they both have to bathe properly and then wear fresh and clean clothes. The bride’s hair is also adorned with beautiful and fresh flowers.

3) Snathakam

The ritual of Snathakam generally takes place at the house of the groom. In this ceremony, the groom is supposed to wear a silver holy thread. This is an indication of his change in status from bachelorhood to a householder.

4) Kashi Yatra

The Kashi Yatra in Telugu weddings is much like the same ceremony that takes place in Tamil weddings. In this ritual, the groom basically pretends to be going off to Kashi as a celibate. This is when the brother of the bride comes into the picture to stop him and asks him to reconsider his decision and marry his sister. The groom, of course, agrees to marry his bride after the persuasion.

5) Mangala Snanam

Mangala Snanam is the wedding ritual in which the bride and the groom are supposed to take a purifying holy bath and thereafter, they must attend an Aarti. It is a process of purifying both the bride and the groom so that they can be ready to attend all the religious ceremonies.

6) Aarti

After the completion of the holy bath, the bride and the groom apply oil on themselves at their own houses. Thereafter, the families of both the bride and the groom perform an Aarti where everybody prays for the long life and happiness of the couple so that they can start their life after getting blessings from the Almighty.

In short, Telugu weddings are very rich in traditions and rituals. The prayers and worshipping are given utmost importance in Telugu weddings. So, if you are fond of this culture and are looking for a Telugu life partner, check out the matrimonial sites on the internet. You will find plenty of matrimony sites with several options and filters to narrow down your search for the perfect one for you!

Fascinating Trivia about Telugu Weddings

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Telugu weddings are all those weddings that take place in the state of Andhra Pradesh or Telangana as we now call it. Telugu matrimony follows all the traditional Hindu rituals of weddings and is an extravaganza in its own right! Attending a Telugu wedding gives you a sense of being transported into a world of luxury and undeniable opulence. Like every couple, Telugu bride and groom also await to tie the knot and step into their matrimonial life with a lot of pomp and show.

Let’s check out some fascinating trivia about Telugu weddings that you probably didn’t know!

1. Initially, Telugu weddings used to last close to 16 days according to the ancient Telugu traditions. However, in the present day, Telugu wedding ceremonies take at the most 2-3 days.

2. The cast of the Indian groom and the bride usually determines what kind of matrimonial ceremonies would be performed during the wedding.

3. The invitations for the wedding are not sent via mail. The families of both the bride and the groom personally visit the houses of the guests with kumkum, which is a colorful red powder.

4. There are several interesting pre-wedding rituals in a Telugu wedding. One of the many rituals includes Snathakam where the groom is supposed to indulge in a holy bath a few hours prior to the wedding. This bath is a sort of graduation for the groom for his changing status from bachelorhood to a householder.

5. Kashi Yatra is another absurd but equally amazing pre-wedding ceremony that happens in a Telugu wedding. In this ceremony, the groom declares his celibacy and then expresses his great desire to travel to Kashi or Varanasi in order to pursue higher studies. However, this is when the bride’s brother comes into the picture and stops the groom from doing so, requesting him to reconsider the decision he has made and then marry his sister. This ritual is super light-hearted and creates a bond and a camaraderie between the future husband-to-be and his brother-in-law. In the end, the groom, of course, agrees to marry the bride and live happily ever after.

6. Telugu matrimony generally happens around midnight.

7. The groom is supposed to perform the Ganesh Puja on the morning of the wedding. On the other hand, the bride is supposed to perform the Gauri Puja. Another ritual known as Pravara is also performed during this time. In this ceremony, the bride’s clan changes from her father’s to her husband-to-be.

8. The groom needs to ride an elephant to the wedding ceremony traditionally. However, with the passage of time, fewer people are following this ritual in Telugu weddings.

9. Kanyadaan is a popular wedding ceremony in which the family gives away the bride to the groom and his family. During this ceremony, the bride’s maternal uncle brings the bride to the wedding venue in a basket made of bamboo.

10. The bride’s parents are also supposed to wash the feet of the groom because he is considered to be the incarnation of Lord Vishnu.

These are some interesting pieces of trivia of things you can expect at a Telugu wedding. If you are also looking for a Telugu bride or groom, you can visit various matrimonial sites or matrimony sites to find your soulmate.