Tag Archives: Tamil marriage

Why Tamil Weddings Are A Must-Attend Event for Everyone

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South Indian Weddings are undeniably very different from North Indian ones. And amongst South Indian cultures, the Tamil population is the major group. Tamil weddings form an important part of the cultural potboiler of Indian weddings. That’s why, Tamil weddings are a must-attend event for everyone!

Tamilians are famous for simple living and high thinking. So, one may wonder what’s the big hullabaloo about their wedding rituals. But precisely because this group of people adheres to the simplicity of age-old traditions and customs, paradoxically, Tamil weddings turn out to be one of the most beautiful and lavish occasions.

Here’s why you must experience this cultural extravaganza at least once in your life!

The Colors of India
Tamil weddings are filled with traditional and spiritual symbolism that form the colorful canvas of ethnic India. The lavish colors in a Tamil wedding are a delight to the eyes. In a typical Tamil marriage scene, you’ll find a constant flow of bright red and sunshine yellow, bold vermilion and cool saffron strewn all around and send your senses into blissful dizziness. Traditionally, these colors also represent purity, spirituality, and passion. The bride’s sari, usually a traditional Kanjeevaram and her gold jewelry will dazzle you with more colors and shine. Similarly, the guests will be draped in lavish, colorful, rich silks. The rituals, the décor, the people, the food, all tend to be a feast of extravagant colors that mirror the rich spirit of this ancient land.
The Collective of Hundreds

Typically, in a Tamil wedding, a decent guest list spills over into a minimum of two to three hundred guests, comprising of the extended family, distant relatives, acquaintances, and friends. You can experience one of the ridiculously largest wedding gatherings in all of the Indian marriage functions in Tamil weddings. The guests are equally colorful, lavishly dressed, ornamented and pleasantly noisy. It is a unique experience to watch such a huge gathering coming together, simply to attend a ceremony and bless the newlyweds.

The Cacophony of Joy
Only in a deeply traditional Indian wedding, a cacophony cannot sound harsh, but melodious. Tamil weddings make use of a variety of ingenious sounds such as the South Indian flute (shehnai), the Vedic incantations, the traditional songs, and the guests chatting away in fluent native Tamil tongue. It’s indeed a stunning experience of sight and sound that a typical Tamil marriage scene offers. One has only to allow oneself to be drowned in this busy, bustling and unique sound shower.

The Culture of Vedic Rites
As said already, Tamil weddings strictly adhere to ageless customs and traditions, and hence, they are a rich experience of ancient Indian nuances for anyone attending the ceremonies. From Kala Pathrika (matching the horoscopes and deciding a wedding date) to Kalyanam (the actual wedding ritual), there are seemingly endless sets of lavish rituals that show us the deeply symbolic faces of the culture. One may say that Tamil weddings are not as extravagant as some of the Northern weddings such as the Punjabi weddings. However, the richness of Vedic rituals, spiritual rites, and folklore-based norms of a Tamil wedding remains incomparable. Their wedding rituals are based on some of the oldest sacred rites mentioned in the ancient text of Hinduism, the Veda.

The Courtyard at Dawn
It can be easily said that as you walk into the various settings of a Tamil wedding ceremony, you start feeling as if you are walking into a royal affair filled with magical moments. Tamil weddings, for starters, take place early in the morning. If not for any other reason, but to experience this absolutely unique dawn-kissed setting of a traditional wedding, you need to attend an authentic Tamil Kalyanam. The venue is usually some original temple courtyard. This courtyard is lavishly decorated with flowers, torans, and auspicious festoons. Here, the bride’s family hosting the wedding, decorate the ‘manavarai’ that is the ceremonial wedding canopy, with bright colors, flowy décor, flowers, festoons, Kalash (earthen pots) and Rangoli (colorful designs). As you walk into such a setting in the golden light of the rising sun, the entire ambiance feels like a magical and mystical hour hailing love and union of two hearts.

The Ceremony of Symbolism
The extensive wedding ceremonies start days prior to the main event with Kala Pathrika rite (setting the wedding date) and Sumangali (worship of the married women) where each ritual is an unparalleled experience to be a part of. Just the ceremony of Pallikai Thellichal is extremely lavish and colorful, where many kinds of grains mixed with curd are poured into seven earthen pots and smeared with sandalwood. The pots are later immersed in the water as an offering to the fishes, a symbol of auspiciousness.

Sumangali Prarthanai is yet another unique ceremony to be found in Tamil weddings. Women who are married and living a prosperous and harmonious married life are referred to as Sumangalis, and such women in odd numbers are worshipped and prayed to by the bride-to-be who then seeks their blessings for a successful and harmonious conjugal life. This ceremony is again dazzling and colorful as each of the Sumangalis are made to wear the traditional nine-yards Madisar sari of vibrant colors.

Thereafter, the sumptuous feast of authentic South Indian food is offered to them on a traditional banana leaf. This rite is altogether a feast to our senses. On the actual day of the marriage, first, an Aarti (fire oblation) is performed, and the auspicious fruit, a coconut, is broken to usher in divine blessings and protection. In the middle of the richly decorated, colorful Mandapam burns the holy wedding fire, ignited and invoked as to the holy witness to the couple’s vows.

The long and detailed rituals such as the Kanyadaan, the smearing of Sindoor and the thali Kutta (tying of the thali, the Tamil equivalent of a mangalsutra) is performed with great pomp, pride, and precision. Each ritual is a sight to behold as a cultural symbolism to explore. The rite of Saptapadi, where the bride walks seven steps rolling a rock forward with her toes, symbolizes the determination with which she presses on in her marital vows to make the union successful. The groom holds her toe, signifying his equal contribution to the marital bliss and success.

In conclusion 

Thus, altogether, the Tamil Matrimony is an unparalleled experience filled with culture, customs, colors, pomp, emotions, and fun. It is such a unique canvas of ethnic and ancient Indian nuances that one must attend a Tamil wedding at least once in their life.

How to Keep the Love Alive in A Tamil Or Telugu Marriage?

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Tamil & Telugu Marriage

Marriages are different in the southern region of India as compared to North India, be it love marriage or arranged. Tamil and Telugu people constitute the significant population of South India, and they are known for their simple living and high caliber of education. If you want to see marriages full of Indian customs and traditions, then attending Telugu & Tamil weddings are a must. Marriage is the most critical spiritual symbol of the Tamil community. It is characterized by fun moments with family, attendance of distant relatives and lots of traditional food.

But there is a lot in life after Kalyanam or marriage. And an essential part of marriage is managing your relationship goals. With the increase in inter-caste marriages in India and even in Tamil and Telugu families, many marriages fail after a few years of marriage due to lack of love, too many fights, and cultural differences. Marriage is just the beginning of a new life, and there is a lot further. Marriage without love is like a flower without fragrance. But in most marriages, love seems to disappear after a few years.

No one wants to have a nasty married life filled with arguments and tension. But after marriage, the proportion of love continues to decrease and of arguments continue to increase in most cases. Let us consider some aspects that will help you keep your love alive in a Telugu or Tamil marriage!

Acceptance: Acceptance is the base of respect, and if you respect each other and your cultural and family differences, then you can go a long way ahead. Accepting each other should not be based on mere words, and it should show up in your actions too. As joint families characterize Tamil or Telugu culture, you should be ready to accept and respect each other’s families and relatives also. Clear communication and realistic expectations are an essential part of accepting each other.

Develop Friendship: In the South Indian culture, mostly the bride and the groom are both educated and at times, working individuals. They might be in the same profession too. It is crucial to develop an attitude of friendship amongst couples to gain confidence in each other. Just like you share your secrets and good times with your besties, if you do it with your soulmate, then you will have a lot of trust and understanding in your married life. Friends do understand each others’ perspectives and stand beside each other in difficult times, and if you share your day with your partner, you will have the same trust in your relationship too.

Compatibility: Tamil matrimony or Telugu matrimony involves a lot of compatibility tests before the family finalizes marriage. You must take the time to understand each others’ values, interests, and goals. This will make you more comfortable with each other.

Do Not Stop Dating: Most couples end spending time with each other after marriage and get involved in their routine life. This is the biggest mistake they can make. It is quite common in South Indian families because, in big families, responsibilities are many. Even holidays and dinners are generally with the entire family. This kills the spark between the couple to some extent. So, take out some time and steal some privacy. Try to impress each other, have fun, love deeply and laugh with each other. You can even date your beau at home. So, bring the romance back into your life.

Share Your Responsibilities: As both husband and wife are working in many modern South Indian families, it becomes difficult to handle personal as well as professional lives effectively. This leads to arguments and fights that can eventually bring an end to your married life. Do not overburden your partner with familial responsibilities. Share the work at home and enjoy spending time with each other while doing the daily chores of the house. Even responsibilities of the kids can be shared. This can be an excellent way to build your relationship stronger.

Give Some Space: Married couples stay together, but that does not mean that they should invade the personal space of each other. After marriage, your partner need not be with you at all times, emotionally and physically. Give enough personal space and freedom to each other so that your love can blossom effectively.

Forgive and Be Forgiven: Arguments and fights are a common thing in every marriage, especially in the initial years till you get used to each other. But if you want to keep the fire of love alive in your hearts, then you must learn to forgive each other. It is not necessary that you would always be right. Also, winning an argument is not going to get you any reward. Holding grudges over small arguments and petty matters can kill your relationship.

Listen: The art of listening is entirely different from hearing, but few people understand it. Understand the verbal and non-verbal meanings of your spouse’s words. Take the time to understand his/her life and health conditions and expectations. If you want a vibrant marriage, then you should listen more than you speak.

Have A Daily Dose of Love: Love and kindness is not meant for birthdays and anniversaries alone. You can celebrate every moment of togetherness and love between you. Do not leave your kindness and affection for special occasions. Giving small gifts to each other, even chocolate or a rose can bring a smile on your partner’s face. The more you love your partner, the more you will receive. So, light up your passion and have a dose of love daily.

Follow these simple tips and make them your way of life. As many Tamil matrimonial sites and Telugu matrimonial sites also advise, if you follow these tips, love will never fade away in your married life. Tamil and Telugu people are born romantic by nature, but if your marriage is in a bad phase due to some misunderstanding, then it is time to hold each other’s hands and say words like “Sorry,” and “I Love you.”

Top 5 Things You Should Know Before Attending a Tamil Wedding

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Attending a Tamil wedding is like entering into a world of royalty. Tamil weddings embrace the use of red hues and gold and pay a lot of attention to the minutest details to the start of your matrimonial bliss. The best features that make a Tamil Wedding unique are the use of saffron and red colors to lend a lot of richness to the décor as these colors are symbol of sensuality and purity. Tamil weddings are very traditional weddings that are based around the Vedas that are the oldest sacred texts in Hinduism. However, they also incorporate a touch of modernism for both the groom and the bride before they embark in the world of matrimony. The ceremony of a Tamil wedding is, in itself, a fairly long process with an elaborate guest list.

Here are the top 5 things you should know before attending a Tamil wedding!

1) The venue of a Tamil Hindu wedding is usually a temple or a banquet hall, although it is sometimes also held in the great outdoors. The guests who attend the wedding must expect the seating to be assigned, taking note of the fact that the family sits in the front. The bride and the groom sit with a priest on a stage that is called a mandap or a manavarai.

2) Regarding the time frame, a typical Tamil wedding ceremony lasts for around an hour and a half. They are usually followed by either lunch or dinner depending on the time that is set for the wedding.

3) Were you wondering what to wear on a Tamil wedding? Well, don’t worry anymore as we have you covered. At Tamil weddings, women are usually seen wearing very traditional sarees. That includes the non-Tamil guests as well. The hair is usually adorned with flowers or tied up in a neat bun. Men who are from the bride or the groom’s immediate family usually wear white dhotis that are the traditional men’s garment. They also wear a white shirt that has a golden border. The rest of the male guests are usually expected to dress in formal attire. Gold is a common factor between both men and women at a Tamil wedding. A tip is to avoid dressing up in black at a Tamil wedding as it is considered bad luck.

4) Food at Tamil weddings is generally a grand affair. Most of the Tamil weddings serve vegetarian dishes. They include dishes like rice and curries, vegetarian rolls and patties, Tamil sweets and eggless cakes. The sweets are usually prepared with buttermilk or rice. Alcohol is prohibited during the wedding ceremony. If there is a reception after the wedding, you are likely to find alcohol and non-vegetarian dishes.

5) Regarding the wedding gift, most couples prefer to receive monetary gifts that can range from anywhere between Rs.1000-5000.

These are some very basic things you must know about when attending a Tamil wedding. Most matrimonial sites would not acquaint you with these important facts. However, for many more such interesting trivia, you can keep visiting our matrimony site for wedding-related info.

Enchanting Ceremonies That Glorifies a Telugu Wedding

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Appealing rituals that exalt Kamma wedding in India is a realm of culture and tradition, neither you nor I can deny that. And of all the holy customs, Telugu marriage tops the rank. This is because ‘A wedding’ is just not only a ceremony to unify a boy and girl in Telugu matrimony. It’s a promise of two endearing souls in heaven, hand-in-hand for a “Together forever” commitment and an exhilarating celebration of two families and well-wishers for a new beginning. So the occasion certainly deserves to be extremely grand and mind-blowing if I am not wrong. You can also take help of Telugu matrimony sites that help people to find desired  Telugu brides and groom.

Snathakam Ceremony for the Groom

This is a popular rite called Snathakam which is done prior to the wedding day in the house of the groom. The groom is asked to wear a sacred silver thread on his body referring the termination of his bachelorhood and accepts the responsibility of taking over the welfare and well being of the family. He is no more a one man and there is a family whom he should take care of, to be more precise, he is a family man from now on. Some people refer the custom as “Upanayanam”.

The Kashi Yatra Custom

This custom is a part of all Telugu weddings. In Tamil marriages this custom s known as Kashi Yatra. This custom adds joy to the viewers as the groom is asked to pretend as if he gets adamant in leaving for Kashi (a pilgrimage) and he is no more interested in marriage or any other earthly happiness. To add more to the fun the bride’s brother acts like pleading his brother-in-law to change his decision and sign the marital agreement with his sister to spend all his life with her.

Haldi Ceremony or Nalagu Rite

The ritual generally takes place in all states and is refered to with different names in different states. In Tamil marriage it is known as Nalagu, whereas north Indians refer it as the Haldi ceremony. The turmeric is smeared on the body of the bride and groom which signifies the rite performed for the purification of the bride and groom.

Viragudi Mokkadam

After ending all the customs at home, the groom sets off to step into the marriage hall. Before that a sacred visit to the temple is mandatory. Isn’t it? But No! This is not as ordinary as before. A big day deserves everything big and special. So is the temple visit. And the groom should worship it for everything to go well in his life. A coconut with turmeric and kumkum on its head will be broken in front of the divine statue of God or goddess. And the holy tradition successfully ends with a puja.

The Bride Arrives

Here comes the magical moment the groom will be longing for. You read it right! I meant the arrival of the bride. The maternal uncle of the girl accompanies her to the Mandap to bring together the couples made in heaven. A curtain will be placed in the middle of the bride and groom, a priest repeating the sacred mantras. Then, the tie knotting ceremony will take place, followed by the wedding rounds. The awesome moment begins with the priest giving Thali (Mangalsutra) to the groom reciting slogans beside. The holy thread that binds the two lives into one is placed right at the center of the bride’s chest. This is to indicate that the bride takes all her marital responsibilities and the love for her new family in her heart. Then they take seven wedding vows around the holy fire and it is believed that the couple is united in front of Panchabhutaalu (earth, air, water, fire, and sky). The customs and traditions hence demonstrate how solemn and vital a Telugu matrimony traditions are.

Simple Yet Exquisite Tamil Matrimony Rituals

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Tamil Matrimony involves simple yet quintessential rituals that have been followed since time immemorial. It is an undeniable fact that traditions and cultures are of prime importance to Tamilians. Though many rituals in Traditional Tamil wedding within the Tamil community have changed a bit over the years, yet they are still being carried out with the same level of enthusiasm and devotion. Tamil marriages are also quite popular for their colorful functions and traditional rituals. The rituals carried out before the actual wedding is usually quite extensive and elaborate as compared to those carried out after. Here are some of the rituals that take place as a part of the Tamil marriage:

1. Pallikali Thalippu: In this ritual, 7 clay pots is embellished using Kumkum powder and Sandalwood paste.  They are then incorporated with 9 varieties of grain, also called Nava dhanyam and curd. These rituals have been performed since ancient times and are mostly performed with great sanctity and belief.

2. Kalyanaponnu: This ritual involves giving a bath to the  Tamil bride to be with pure turmeric mixed with other essential oils. This particular ritual is common in both bride and groom’s house. It is believed that after this ceremony, both bride and groom cannot leave their house and not see each other until the wedding ceremony is completed.

3. Naandi Shrardham: Before the wedding, both the families of the bride and groom seek the blessings of their ancestors and pray to the souls of their ancestors. They also invite around 10 or more Brahmins and the respective families serve them South Indian feast. The feast includes sweets, flowers, coconuts, fruits, pan Supari, traditional South Indian clothes etc.

4. Nichayathartham (Engagement): Mainly performed by the bride’s family in Tamil wedding, this ritual starts with a Ganesh Puja. After the Puja, the groom’s family hands over the clothes, jewelry, and gifts to the bride. On the other hand bride’s family gives the clothes and gifts to the groom. Then both bride and groom wear the dress given by each other family. This is followed by groom’s sister applying tilak and kumkum on the bride’s forehead whereas bride’s brother applying the same on the groom’s forehead. Later, bride and groom exchange engagement rings in the presence of their near and dear ones.

5. Wedding Ceremony: After the groom arrives, the bride’s mother washes the feet of the groom with the mix of water, Chandan, and kumkum. The bride then enters the mandap and they exchange the exquisite flower garlands as a part of the ritual, also known as Maalai Maatral followed by Oonjal, known as swing ceremony.

Thereafter is performed Kanyanadanam, when the bride’s father hands over daughter’s hand to the groom for the lifetime. The groom then applies sindoor on the bride’s head and ties a Mangalsutra also known as Thaali around her neck. After this, both bride and groom walk around the fire and take seven rounds around it and with this all the quintessential and amazing Tamil wedding rituals come to an end.